Friday, September 12, 2014

on the eve of twenty five

currently i am typing this from the bedroom of my best friends house in southern california. yesterday i loaded up my suitcase and hopped on a plane to come spend the next five days with one of my most favorite people. and of course, to ring in another year of life with someone who has been apart of it longer than she hasn't. 

i celebrated an early birthday with a dinner at the old spaghetti factory. my mom and dad were there, of course, my grandma and aunt janet, and my sweet boyfriend bobby (who i'm sure you'll hear much more about as time goes on) i was greeted with pretty flowers from bobby and balloons from my aunt. we drank iced teas and ate sliced bread and my family grilled bobby with questions. my grandma and aunt wrote me sweet messages in cards and my mom and dad in addition to buying my plane ticket, bought me a necklace with a "k" pendant. bobby got me a cute card, tickets to see on of my favorite bands play in san francisco, movie passes, and a stuffed animal bunny (who may or may not be the cutest thing i've ever seen. and he may or may not be sitting next to me on the bed right now.)

i'm not entirely sure what this weekend will bring. but i know i'm spending it with char and that means it's going to be wonderful. i'm just excited to hear about her life, share a few days acting like 16 year olds, and cheers to one more year that we have accomplished together. 

it's crazy to think i am almost 25. twenty five. a quarter of a century. it's so strange to think because in my heart i still feel like i'm fifteen. i still don't know what i want to be when i grow up. fart jokes still make me laugh and i can't help but get super pumped up when i hear the cha-cha slide. i guess maybe some of those things will never change. and i'm okay with that. 

i originally wanted to write this post to make a list of 25 things i hope to achieve by next year. or at least to work towards. but as i continue to write this i don't think i want to do that. because i'm incredibly happy with where i am. and with the people in my life. and the direction my life is going. i don't want to start another year of life with a list that i am already falling behind on.

i just want being twenty five to be filled with love. i want to spend more time at home and take my grandma to lunch. i want to plan adventures with charla and talk for hours on the phone about the dumb things we did as kids. i want to cherish special friendships and not take anyone for granted. i want to enjoy being loved by someone incredible and let compliments wash over me instead of pushing them to the side. i want to eat more and worry less about my body and more about the people i'm sharing meals with. i want to take time for myself and binge watch netflix. i want to go on drives and roll the windows down and sing way too loud for anyone comfort level. i want to embrace what being a woman to me is and not let the media or society tell me i should be. i want to worry less about insignificant things and really dwell on the simplicity of life.

i want to give to those who love me.
i want to love without borders to the people who deserve it. 
i want to be light and happiness.
i want to laugh and cry and pee my pants with happiness. 


as of now, charla has walked in the door with a gorgeous bouquet of flowers and balloons. i'm signing off from here and the next time i write to you i'll be 25. 

to all my friends, family, and loves. thank you for getting me to twenty five. i wouldn't be here without you. and i wouldn't want to be without you.

infinite x's and o's

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