Wednesday, April 25, 2012


ive been missing home a lot lately. but not in the way that i need to go back but in the way that makes my soul ache. i started thinking about what it is about home that i miss and i realize there's no way i could even begin to describe it all. but all i do know is that i miss the smell of my house. from the cinnamon appley fragrance  it always holds for some strange reason to the smell of dad bbqing something delicious on the back porch. the sound of rosies tail thumping against the wall when i get home and sneaking her treats when no one is looking. my mom hugging and jumping on me saying she loves me. my dad pinching my arm while we are watching tv just because he loves me. the smell of my room and sleeping hard on my cold sheets after a long night. lunch dates and sleepless nights with kelsey talking about everything. drives, music, parks, and always laughing with nigel. board games and drinks at robs on any given night. late nights with jamie and tara laughing and eating and enjoying each other. grandmas house on sunday nights and arguing over what movie to watch. chipotle. honestly, i miss it so much. laying around in my pj's all afternoon and watching movies with the dogs. the way my feet knew every single step through the house that i could walk through with my eyes closed and not run into anything. the sound of dads motorcycle in the morning and knowing that when the garage door opens its 4:35 and he's home from work. sushi dates with nick and being complete goof balls together and knowing there's no way we aren't related. mom coming in my room every morning for something and always waking me up no matter how hard she tried not to. the streets of madison and sunrise that carry too many memories to count and all the houses in between that hold lost lovers and old friends. driving around in kelsey's truck, stella, drinking mexican hot chocolate and blasting nsync. sitting in the passenger seats and on the couches of countless friends who became more like family and loving them like they are a part of me because that's exactly what they are. driving around by myself in my little marshmallow cars singing along to all my favorite songs and getting lost on all the same familiar streets.

i miss all that and so much more.

but i know that im suppose to be here. i know this is my present and future. at least for now. i just hope all the people back home know i love and miss them more than they can imagine. 
sacramento you will always have a piece of me <3

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